God is good. That’s all there is to it. The Holy Spirit has brought to mind the things I am to share with you today. Coffee in hand. My journal, bible, and heart are wide open. I’m ready to bring you to a level transparency that shows how in my weakness, I am made strong.

Y’all, I’ve been struggling these last few weeks. I mean, I have felt like the weight of this world has been on my shoulders. We all have been there. We’ve all been under the constraints of life.

In the spirit of “sharing is caring”, I’m going to share a few of my woes with you in hopes that perhaps one or a few of them will ring true with you today. Golly, that sounds sick? Doesn’t it??? Like I’m misery and would love some company??? That’s not what I mean and you know it.

My hope is that something may sound familiar because the ending of this short story is a good one.

I have a lot going on in my personal life at the moment. Nothing that I’m not able to overcome but with the evils of this world exasperating them, it feels more like the end of the world.

• My last cycle turned up a BFN {Big Fat Negative}. Based on my BBT charting, I wasn’t necessarily expecting a positive but of course us Infertile Myrtles are always hoping for a surprise BFP {Big Fat Positive}.
• Right after that happened, I was helping Brooksie with some farm work. Something I got into has caused an allergic reaction on my face. My ENTIRE FACE is covered in a rash and is a bit puffy and dry. Literally, from the hairline on my forehead to my eyelids to my mouth and chin and parts of my neck and ears are engulfed in a skin colored rash that is irritable to say the least especially when exposed to heat. UGH!
• I’m just getting over being sick with allergies for like a month!

These are some of the biggies but I’ve also been dealing with the normal day to day stuff. My husband’s health, my health, adjusting to our new tight budget lifestyle, farm decisions, business decisions, family relationship issues, church responsibilities, delivery season for beef shares, the list goes on and on.

If that weren’t enough on my plate, I have been praying about expanding my writing ministry and pursuing opportunities to write for other sites. 

Long story short, I had JUST decided to look into it last week when WHAMMY! I was attacked by a reader. I mean way to kick a girl when she’s down! Now, I can take criticism as “well” as anybody else. It’s not easy but with some intentional listening we can accept it, right? As long as it’s constructive. But there was something about her word choices and approach that didn’t sit well with me. It was weird and seemed off. But it discouraged me none the less.

Before launching this ministry, my aunt-in-law had warned me to expect these kind of attacks. Even still, I admit it made me waver a bit.

Here it is I’m considering furthering my life as a writer and here comes evil in sheep’s clothing to make an attempt against what God has planted. After the initial shock wore off, I settled into His word to lick my wounds.

In general, it always seems like when it rains it pours. Everything happens at once and sometimes you wonder “God, where are you in all this?”. That was me until yesterday.

To handle all of this, I’ve been spending an exorbitant amount of time in prayer and scripture. In Jeremiah 33:3, God promises to answer us if we seek Him.

Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not. 

That’s just what I was looking for. Answers. Why was God allowing all of this and now? How can He allow me to be so discouraged while at the same time calling me to do something good?

You would think we’ve endured enough in these kinds of unending seasons or perhaps like in my case our life as a whole. But, our hope can and should be just as relentless. In the midst of my sufferings, our pastor preached a sermon challenging us to remember and engrave God’s promises onto our hearts. Perfect timing.

I needed to do just this. As I sat crying over some of these things happening, I journaled out His promises that would fill a few of my deficits. Some of them I shared here.

Psalm 132:15 – I will bless her with abundant provisions; her poor will I satisfy with food. {Provision}

Psalm 91:4 – He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust. His truth shall be thy shield and buckler. {Protection}

Psalm 94:4 – For the Lord will not cast off his people, neither will he forsake his inheritance. {His Presence}

Psalm 25:13 – His (a man who fears the Lord) soul shall dwell at ease; his seed shall inherit the earth. {Peace}

I am working through a bible study with my church and it’s walking us through 1 & 2 Thessalonians. We are on week six of the homework. It’s all about mobilizing our ministry.

It reminded me that everything I had been going through over these last few weeks was simply God equipping me for what is yet to come in my ministry. The writer states:

Every time we’ve been broken and then allowed God to repair us, that mending becomes part of our equipping.

See? I sought and he answered. All of the brokenness is a part of the priceless process of growth and preparation. In my weakness, I am made strong and all things work for good. What a fresh and encouraging word!

I was given other answers this week to my challenges. God reminded me of someone who I could use as a point of contact as I pursue my writing future. The other came just this morning. I will share that one in a later post.

As I take a new step each day in this walk, I am reminded of God’s character. Every time I falter, He’s there to correct. Every time I suffer, He’s there to strengthen. Every time I get lost, He’s there to redirect. Every bout of discouragement is met with His endless source of encouragement. He never fails. That’s who He is and what He is all about. His character and integrity are solid. Our Hope can endure and will.