When I read things like this, I’m empowered to create a better environment in hopes that I will become a better person. Changes that perhaps change the course of my marriage or the life of another. I want to be careful about the company I keep, the food I eat, the things I say “yes” to. I’m usually moved to work out, eat healthy, be patient in my marriage, get up early on a rainy Sunday morning (Ha!).

But what about when I am battling something I CAN’T change? Something like the physical & emotional manifestations of infertility?

To address the depths of emotion we Infertile Myrtles have on a consistent basis takes something much stronger than a quirky quote off the internet.

It takes learning to not just survive but THRIVE. I’ve had to learn how to be an OVERCOMER. Not with a few small changes here and there like the ones described above. But, in ways that took so much more willpower than I knew I possessed. It took intentionality and God’s strength.

I tell you the truth, I was so tired of being a recluse and living life in the shadows of my fears & disappointments. I prayed that God would make me stronger. I had read over and over that He never intended us to be fearful little people, but mighty. And as Mandisa sings – You’re an overcomer!

So, I started MENTALLY tackling the things that brought me the most fear. Things like pregnancy announcements, baby showers, and even going out with the girls!

True story, I once went out on a dinner & movie date with my girlfriends. I always looked forward to the laughs and… well overshares… But in this particular season, it was the first time we had been out in a while.

Several of the girls had just had babies in the months prior and so the entire conversation at dinner was all about their little ones. So and so’s baby isn’t sleeping through the night. The other’s baby is teething. Another’s is starting preschool.  I left that evening feeling completely depressed, alone and inadequate. I had just spent 4 hours with about 7 of my closest friends. How could I feel this way??? Needless to say, for a while after that, I wasn’t all that eager to get together.

Mind you, this was also a season when my life was based solely around my fears. I was trying to handle this thing on my own. So, there was no boldness to educate my friends or those around me. No coming out of the infertility closet.

My point is this, start being INTENTIONAL about creating the new you in an environment that you can’t change. When you hear a pregnancy announcement, learn to REJOICE. When you are invited to a baby shower, GO! Don’t avoid them! When it seems like you are the only one in your life to not be spitting out babies, DO open up, educate, support.

It will take some mental toughness and intentionality on your part but I promise that you will grow from this. Practice makes perfect. Be encouraged.

Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will COMPLETE it until the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:6 {emphasis added}